Today, we are not being shaken.
For those of you that read Keep Your Head Up Mama, You Are Gonna Turn Out Fine, you know that our little Leah has been giving POD D some entertainment. Since our last post, Leah has had two significant episodes where her heart rate and oxygen saturation has dropped extremely low. Yesterday morning, I encouraged our team of doctors to do an echo-cardiogram simply for mine and Andrew’s peace of mind. For the past couple of days, Andrew and I have both had a “feeling” that something else is going on with our little girl besides these apnea desaturations. We wanted to see her heart. As a Mama, I wanted to know for certain that she was okay. The technician came and performed the echo yesterday afternoon. Upon receiving results, our resident doctor came to tell me that Leah’s PDA is still open and there is more blood flowing through to her lungs. Due to these results, Leah had a chest X-Ray done to view her lungs. THANKFULLY, Leah’s lungs looked great! They read clear and there was not a significant amount of fluid built up that performing surgery would be emergent at this time. So, last night we left without a concrete decision about where to go from here.
This morning, I met with our team of doctors and the cardiologist about where we are and what will happen moving forward to get these girls home! Amelia is on a fast track people! She is doing awesome! As I type the words I am thinking in my head, “Each word you say is a jinx…. don’t type it…. don’t think it’s real…we have already had two false alarms…are you sure you want to put it out there…” Amelia is on DAY 6 of her eight-day countdown. Andrew and I are scheduled to spend Saturday and Sunday night with Amelia, and bring her home with us on MONDAY! I probably should preface that with the word…maybe. Bold, italicize, underline and everything—MAYBE. Leah on the other hand has earned her a few more days in NICU. Last night while feeding, she did have an apnea episode that required her to receive oxygen. The doctors believe these continuous episodes are only due to her prematurity, and not the PDA. So, Leah earned her a restart to her countdown and another eight days. If she still needs time to grow, develop, and mature, Andrew and I know in our hearts that she is in the perfect place to do that. While it will be hard to only have one of our girls at home, and the other in the hospital, we will continue to be patient and trust in God’s perfect timing! As of right now, surgery is not emergent for Leah’s PDA. Clinically it does not seem to be causing too many problems. So, we will be having outpatient follow-up appointments with cardiology here at UNC. The cardiologist wants Leah to continue to grow and get stronger to perform an outpatient catheterization to close the PDA. He suspects this would be between 4 and 6 months of age.
Each and everyday I am constantly reminded of this truth: TRUST IN HIM. All along in our NICU journey, I have hoped I would bring both of my girls home at the same time and whenever we were to leave the hospital, we would not have to come back. The Lord is constantly shaping my faith to be unwavering, and that my trust in Him should be constant instead of every now and then as I go through the motions. As mighty as God is, I should not even attempt at taking over control of His plan for our family. As I sit by the girls bedside and write this post, I am granted with abundant peace by their sweet faces and these two scripture passages that are taped to their cribs.
“…Be strengthen with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you…” Colossians 1:11-12
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they TRUST in YOU.” Isaiah 26:3
As we continue to venture along this journey, continue to pray for strength, guidance, and healing. God is an ALMIGHTY HEALER and I am so blessed at how far we have come in the past two months. If I were to predict the end of this game, Amelia is going to score the touchdown on 3rd & Goal, and Leah will come out on the field and kick the extra point for the home team. Like her Papa G!
Three words. Wait and See.
Not being Shaken, but Standing FIRM in HIS promises,