Six years ago, I was a rising high school senior in search of the best yearbook theme. As editor-in-chief, my creative juices were constantly flowing as I sought out to make our yearbook the best. Living in Wallace, 95.1 WRNS was a must-have preset station on any car radio. On the last day of school, I was on my way home when I heard the song. The song that I would turn into our yearbook theme, Seasons of Our Lives. The song that six years later is still applicable to my life, but in a different way.
Three weeks ago, my parents traded in my very first car. The same car that played this song repeatedly the summer of 2008. The same car that drove me to my very first job at ACE Hardware, yes I know. This girly girl worked in a hardware store, I can’t believe it either. The same car that heard countless conversations, endured loud and obnoxious jam sessions, saw laughter and tears, sped to Wallace-Rose Hill, held more girls than safety allowed, took trips to TI, drove me to college, and always led me home. The same car that saw me grow up. When I found out that my precious ‘gold chevy cobalt’ would soon be sold for its parts and metal, it got me thinking about just how fast my life is going. This song, “Never Gonna Feel Like That Again”, rings true to most anyone. We all endure different seasons of life. What we’ve done to this point cannot be undone, but what we do next is still unwritten. We are all writing new chapters of our lives. We are all running different races, when time is rushing by us like the wind. We all have to grab each moment that we can because, why? We’re never gonna feel like this again.
When I was at work today, I happened to write down today’s date, June 9th. It dawned on me that five years ago today I graduated high school. I about fell out of my chair! Seriously? Have I really been out of high school for five years? It honestly feels like yesterday that I spent that summer with friends, family, and getting ready to leave for college. Has college really already happened? Yes. Um…When did that go down? Am I now married with two babies? Lord, have mercy on my soul!
I still remember when I was in middle school and would dream about the day I got to drive a car, have a cell phone, my high school graduation, what college would be like, falling in love, who would I marry, what my wedding day would be like, when would I have babies, how many would I have… ya know, the usual. I was real awkward in middle school…I dreamed a lot seeing that my reality consisted of lime green braces, glasses, make-up lines, unruly hair, and a wardrobe I didn’t know quite how to put together. Needless to say, this awkward, awkward preteen has now grown up to realize how important it is not to measure life, but to live it.
Life is consisted of many moments that we either allow ourselves to grab, or pass by. I have seen how fast life can happen, and I have seen how quickly life can be taken away. As I spent time reflecting on these past five years, I realized there is a reason as to why God limits our days. So we make each day precious.
In this new season of life as a wife and mother, my dreams are a little different. In our marriage, Andrew and I share each others dreams. We dream together. As a mother, I am so excited to continue to see how God works through Amelia and Leah’s life as they grow and become dreamers themselves. While it is bittersweet to see how fast some pivotal life moments have come and gone, I am excited to watch those same life moments play out as a mom. One dream that I have for my girls is that they embrace their childhood. I am already playing against the clock as to how fast this is all going to go by, I don’t want them to speed up the process by wishing it away.
I have noticed that some kids and teenagers are already trying to be ‘grown-up’ in a sense. I don’t want Amelia and Leah to have this mentality. I want them to know there will come a time to be a grown up and do grown up things, but God blesses you with only one childhood… so embrace it and be young. I want them to cherish their childhood because there is plenty of time to be a grown up later! It’s way more fun to get Seventeen magazine in the mail versus seventeen bills.
As their mother, I pray that I will remember not to measure life but to live it as well. I don’t want to get caught up in the urgency to reach milestones, and miss the sweet days as we strive towards them. In this season, I am simply pursuing Jesus in the midst of all the imperfections. I am daily seeking to know Christ more so that my home will see and know Him more everyday to. What a joyous season He has me in!
If you had asked me on my graduation day, “Where will you be five years from now?” I wouldn’t have said a wife and mother. The Lord has taken me along a journey that has blown my mind. Where will I be five years from now? Let’s just say I’m taking it a day at a time. I am making these days precious because this season shall pass, and I know I’ll never feel like this again.
Till the next season,